I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I wish I only lived at night.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
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I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
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High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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