just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
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