Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
