Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
