She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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