Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
