have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
hell yes lets make some ravioli
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
