Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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