you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
