I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize