how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize