no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
