had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
