Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
