I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize