He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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