So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
dude. I can hear the air.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
I see more hoeing in ur future
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
