I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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