omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
