gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
