Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize