At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize