During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize