walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
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