Texts From Last Night

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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  So drunk i had to piss sitting down...

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  (803): So drunk i had to piss sitting down... http://tfl.nu/050t
  Replies (7) Good night (1050) Bad night (491)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.

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  (908): he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me. http://tfl.nu/x367
  Replies (16) Good night (4647) Bad night (3581)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....

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  (309): so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower.... http://tfl.nu/5ddp
  Replies (14) Good night (1183) Bad night (4268)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.

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  (724): I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more. http://tfl.nu/i8a4
  Replies (13) Good night (3233) Bad night (1231)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.

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  (802): Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle. http://tfl.nu/jhbj
  Replies (7) Good night (3009) Bad night (1507)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again

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  (201): I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again http://tfl.nu/h58y
  Replies (18) Good night (1862) Bad night (1505)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..

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  (815): It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar.. http://tfl.nu/fcka
  Replies (0) Good night (1347) Bad night (744)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.

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  (412): It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult. http://tfl.nu/japr
  Replies (9) Good night (2034) Bad night (897)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake

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  (270): no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake http://tfl.nu/nyba
  Replies (5) Good night (2411) Bad night (776)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.

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  (317): The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today. http://tfl.nu/2j3f
  Replies (9) Good night (2463) Bad night (789)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number

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  (908): Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number http://tfl.nu/xbwx
  Replies (5) Good night (617) Bad night (1711)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  He's only going to be gone for two weeks

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  That's two months in gay whore years.

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  (314): He's only going to be gone for two weeks (1-314): That's two months in gay whore years. http://tfl.nu/9nuw
  Replies (3) Good night (1218) Bad night (552)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.

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  (801): Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome. http://tfl.nu/egsw
  Replies (12) Good night (1060) Bad night (456)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.

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  (570): The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better. http://tfl.nu/cik5
  Replies (4) Good night (648) Bad night (260)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.

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  (619): She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it. http://tfl.nu/d8em
  Replies (1) Good night (915) Bad night (229)

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