Texts From Last Night

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  (209): View more from California

  HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.

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  (209): HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24????? (606 ): We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour. http://tfl.nu/y88k
  Replies (30) Good night (3554) Bad night (758)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  "women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc

  (1-201): View more from New Jersey

  damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy

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  (201): "women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc (1-201): damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy http://tfl.nu/c3kq
  Replies (29) Good night (2602) Bad night (645)
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  (707): View more from California

  that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it

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  (707): that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it http://tfl.nu/zuoy
  Replies (18) Good night (4804) Bad night (678)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.

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  (215): tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style. http://tfl.nu/z5di
  Replies (11) Good night (3610) Bad night (1119)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer

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  (732): just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer http://tfl.nu/hop7
  Replies (25) Good night (6600) Bad night (1324)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.

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  (337): Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning. http://tfl.nu/g9g5
  Replies (19) Good night (9168) Bad night (1293)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club

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  (815): so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club http://tfl.nu/2gpd
  Replies (9) Good night (2480) Bad night (898)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.

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  (989): his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted. http://tfl.nu/sm1y
  Replies (19) Good night (4088) Bad night (1077)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.

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  (718): She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love. http://tfl.nu/h785
  Replies (9) Good night (1576) Bad night (718)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.

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  (856): Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox. http://tfl.nu/almc
  Replies (18) Good night (2033) Bad night (723)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified

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  (812): She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified http://tfl.nu/xfst
  Replies (9) Good night (1386) Bad night (781)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti

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  (610): We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature (610): Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti http://tfl.nu/iam9
  Replies (1) Good night (1166) Bad night (600)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning

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  (512): The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning http://tfl.nu/lha0
  Replies (5) Good night (1456) Bad night (496)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas

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  (303): I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas http://tfl.nu/dh3n
  Replies (3) Good night (783) Bad night (317)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.

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  (440): You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids? (330): Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice. http://tfl.nu/lps6
  Replies (4) Good night (1066) Bad night (304)

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