i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
this will be a night to untag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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