i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
