Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
