i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize