There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
