party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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