im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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