My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
