we have officially lost it.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
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