I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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