i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
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