we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize
