Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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