I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
