Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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