They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Can vaginas get frostbite?
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.