That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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