they need to just BURY HIM!
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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