Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
how drunk are you?
Several
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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