I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
