Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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