is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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