Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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