remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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