he wants to bone in the snuggie
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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