Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
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